Sextortion: what parents should do in the first 24 hours
Calm, step-by-step. Take It Down, evidence preservation, reporting, and what to say to your kid.
Minute 0: stay calm
The scammer is counting on panic. You need your kid to trust you enough to hand over the evidence and stop responding. Your tone is more important than your words right now.
Hour 1
- Tell your kid: “You did the right thing telling me. This is a scam. We’re going to fix it. You’re not in trouble.”
- Stop responding to the attacker. Do not pay. Do not send anything new.
- Screenshot: profile, username, every message, any dollar amounts, any images the attacker sent or claims to have.
- Do NOT block yet — blocking sometimes auto-deletes the chat evidence.
Hours 1-6
- Use NCMEC Take It Down. Follow the flow on the kid’s phone — the service hashes the image locally, then asks participating platforms to take it down without ever uploading it.
- Report on the platform: Instagram / Snap / Discord / Roblox have “sextortion” or “exploitation” report flows.
- Report to the CyberTipline: report.cybertip.org.
- Now block the account.
Hours 6-24
- Report to FBI IC3: ic3.gov. Sextortion is a federal crime.
- Contact local police non-emergency line if you want a local record.
- Change your kid’s social-media passwords; enable 2-step verification if not already on.
- Alert your kid’s school counselor if the attacker might contact peers.
Hours 24-72
- Monitor social media for the image appearing. Take It Down increases the chance of automated takedowns, but manual reports may still be needed.
- Pay attention to your kid’s mental state. Loop in a therapist if available.
- Review whether other images (current or historical) are on the kid’s device that could be a future target.
What not to do
- Don’t pay. Paying almost never ends the threats; it proves the victim will pay.
- Don’t delete evidence before screenshotting.
- Don’t shame your kid. Shame is how these cases escalate to crisis.
- Don’t handle it alone. File the reports. The law-enforcement trail matters for prosecution and for other families.
See our full sextortion topic guide for prevention.
Common questions
What is the very first thing to do?
Stay calm and say so out loud: “You did the right thing telling me. This is a scam. We are going to fix it. You are not in trouble.” The scammer is relying on panic, and your tone in the first minute matters more than the words.
Should we block the account straight away?
No — not until you have screenshotted everything. Blocking sometimes auto-deletes the chat and takes the evidence with it. Capture the profile, username, every message, any amounts demanded and any images, then block once that is done.
Should we pay?
No. Payment almost never ends the threats — it proves the victim will pay, and the demands continue. This is the most consistent finding across these cases.
How do we get the image taken down?
Use NCMEC’s Take It Down, following the flow on your child’s phone. The service hashes the image locally and asks participating platforms to remove it without the image ever being uploaded. Then report through the platform’s own exploitation flow and to the CyberTipline at report.cybertip.org.
Who do we report this to?
The platform, the CyberTipline at report.cybertip.org, and the FBI at ic3.gov — sextortion is a federal crime. Contact your local police non-emergency line if you want a local record, and tell your child’s school counsellor if the attacker may approach their peers.
What should we do in the days after?
Change social-media passwords and enable two-step verification, watch for the image resurfacing since manual reports may still be needed alongside Take It Down, and pay close attention to your child’s mental state — involve a therapist if one is available. Shame and isolation are what turn these cases into crises.